Notes From Sison, Pangasinan Part VII
Sometimes I don’t understand life. I don’t understand why it has to be the way we don’t want it to be: sometimes we laugh and sometimes we cry, sometimes we succeed and sometimes we fail, sometimes we fall in love and we get hurt, sometimes we fall in love again but we’ll never ever know what will happen next. Holy shit! And life sucks sometimes? Yes, definitely!
What’s going on with me now? I used to be soft-hearted – meaning I easily break if I see beggars and kids roaming the street – but now I don’t know! I mean I think I don’t feel the same anymore! It looks like there’s only a little space here in my heart left for them especially now that I have to feed myself and now that I’ve been made a lot stronger by all the trials and challenges I’ve gone through. Yes, I feed myself and I work so damn hard because my father’s tired and sick of feeding me! See? How can I be soft-hearted again if I was made hard by all the things that happened in my life?! But, honestly, I hate myself for being this numb and insensitive to what’s going on with my countrymen! I swear!
Good thing we’re okay now because if not I’m gonna blame myself for the rest of my life! The set-up was my idea so I’m really thankful that it’s finally over! And please don’t judge me for what I’ve done!
@Kj: Happy Birthday to you! I wish you good luck, good health and of course more and more and more birthdays to come! I love you and I thank you for the joy you brought in my life! Thanks, thanks thanks!